Lead, and I Will Follow

I haven't written since this summer.  The truth is, quite a bit has happened since then and finally, the news is public so I can write more candidly about where God is leading me.  In close to 6 months, I will be leaving for the Dominican Republic to work there as a missionary.  Lots has happened to lead me there.  I have never been so sure of God's will for my life than I am now, and yet there are feelings of fear, of being overwhelmed, and moments of awe of what God can and has shown me and just how abundant He is.

To write about His blessings in this process would be a task, as God has blessed me with a wonderful group of people who have prayed for me for a long time. They have prayed about my fears, for clarity, for the details, and much more.  I am so grateful for them.  In addition to prayer, they have supported me by designing cards, giving advice, helping me budget, downloading pictures, creating my blog, stuffing envelopes, and just listening when I am scared or overwhelmed.  God has blessed me more than I can express and through the people He has put into my life and the small moments, I realized His power.  I truly wonder what His complete plan is, and I cannot wait to follow His lead.

I am still reading through the Bible and find myself in the beginning of 1 Samuel.  Samuel has shown his dedication to the Lord as a judge, his sons have become judges, but are not leading lives that follow God, and the Israelites have proclaimed their strong desire for an earthly king.  It strikes me that God, even knowing the freedom that will be lost in them having a king, still allows them to make the choice to get one.  But, God chooses the king for them... Saul.  Saul, while tall in stature, comes from the smallest clan and is completely unsuspecting.  He even wonders why God would choose him to be King.  Well, flipping forward a bit, I realize that Saul doesn't even live the life that God had planned for him.  He throws it away.  In the words of Samuel, Saul acts foolishly and does not keep God's command.  God chose Saul and has ideas of establishing Saul's kingdom over Israel for all time, but Saul, not knowing God's full plan, is fearful and thus disobeys. As a result, God grieves and eventually chooses another leader in Saul's place.

I rejoice in knowing that God has chosen me to help further His kingdom. While I cannot see the end result of God's plan, I really want to follow His lead.  I know that God is calling me.  I want nothing more to step into His will.  While I fear and while it may seem like a crazy idea to step out of such a comfortable life to live in a foreign land with mostly strangers, to live with inconsistent electricity, to be dependent on others to support God's plan for my life, and to be away from my family and close friends, I know that God's will has clearly been revealed to me.  I will follow.  After all, by stepping into God's will, I am proclaiming my faith, that I am sure of what I hope for and certain of what I am yet to see.  And, I know that if I do not follow God's plan, He can and will give it to someone else for His will be done!

In 1 Samuel 15:22, Samuel rebukes Saul for not following through with God's plan and disobeying with these words:

Does the Lord delight in burnt offering and sacrifices

as much as in obeying the voice of the Lord?

To obey is better than sacrifice

and to heed is better than the fat of rams.

For rebellion is like the sin of divination.

and arrogance like the evil of idolatry.

Because you have rejected the word of the Lord

he has rejected you as king.

I want nothing more than at the end of my life when I meet God face to face for Him to smile and say, "Well done, good and faithful servant.  Well done."  May He continue to lead me down His path, and may he provide me with the strength, courage, and faith to follow wherever that path may lead. -AMEN.