Friday, September 27, 2019

Feeling God's Presence in Transition





It's been 2 months since I arrived in the States.  I've gone through a good bit of transition in that time, and will probably continue to go through transition for the next few months.  But today, I find myself sitting in a recently furnished studio-apartment at the seminary in Boston's North Shore where hopefully, I will live for the next 3 years.  I am grateful for time of travel and rest and now, to be getting settled into my new "home."

I spent the month of August with family and friends, had a little bit of counseling, and enjoyed a sabbath week at a lake house in Missouri with a missionary friend. Spending time in God's creation, catching up with family, reading God's Word, and cooking were some of my highlights during that month before eventually driving 20 hours to New England.

Many people ask me how I am doing with the culture shock.  Overall, I'm doing fine, not really realizing that I've been away for so long... and sometimes thinking that the "culture shock thing" doesn't even apply to me.

...until I find myself in a roundabout and forget which country I am in and what the roundabout rules are,

or until I go into the grocery store to find a stick of butter and then remember everything comes in bulk here,

or until I realize that I look different again, not like in the Dominican where my brown skin blended in with everyone else's around me.

Oh!  And then I remember about time.  Being on time means being early here. I need to be on time.

Oh yes! Americans are efficient  (and busy, busy, busy).

Oh, and I forgot... people eat dinner before 9 o'clock at night here.  I have to remember that when I have someone over for dinner.

(Oh yes, and I just discovered this past week that vending machines don't require cash anymore.  That was a shock! Who knew that I could use a credit card to buy a pack of potato chips?)

Sometimes, I find my mind, my emotions, and my body just tired. Other times I feel quite normal and am up for the hours of studying and preparation for class.

Before moving to this area, I was encouraged to embrace the idea of having "grace" with myself during this time of transition and was reminded in one moment of tears, that God has grace with me... so I should have grace with myself as well.  After all, God is not looking at me in this season shaking His head, but instead He has His arm on my shoulder and His face?  Smiling, I'm sure, at my courage to take this step.  (This point has helped me tremendously not to become too overwhelmed as I forge ahead into this new season while still adjusting to life in the States.)

God is with me and I feel His presence every day.

And, those "culture shock" moments are not my every moment by any means.  They are difficult because they sneak up on me when I least expect them, and they remind me that my passport country has not been my "home" for quite a while and that I did not grow up in northeastern United States.  Many days, I am reminded that I have changed and that I see the world a bit differently than I did before.

I'm still getting used to the New England weather which has ranged from between the low 40s and the low 80s since I've arrived here.  And yes, I am still a bit fearful of the weather between November and May.  I've been told to enjoy the sun because I won't see much of it again until July.  God help me!

And of course, there is so much to enjoy!  I have enjoyed my hot showers, the ease of washing clothes, and coffee creamer always being at the grocery store!  I've enjoyed eating vegetables like squash and brussel sprouts, the strong water pressure, and asiago bagels.  I'm looking forward to watching the leaves change and going apple-picking this fall.  The beaches and trails have been a great way to spend some of the warmer days as well.

I am adjusting.

I am not looking quite as long at the coins when I have to give someone change. I have finally stopped using GPS to go to the places I most often frequent, and I'm not caught off-guard quite as often when I hear the very distinct Boston accent.  (Did you know that a carriage is what you use in a grocery store and that there are city names that look like they would be pronounced in 3-syllables but are instead pronounced in only 2? For example, the city Gloucester "glah- che- ster" is actually pronounced "glah-ster.")  I don't hesitate quite as long before using water from the sink to cook, and I'm remembering more and more that I can flush the toilet tissue down the toilet here.

And over the last 2 months, I have seen over and over again that God is faithful.

God is Jehovah Jireh, my provider.
Various friends and family members have helped make the transition to Gordon-Conwell smoother with generous financial donations, prayers, and provision of things that I need.  I could become very overwhelmed by all that I have to get and do in order to live here and be warm.  But, I have seen Jehovah Jireh abundantly in the family and friends who have remembered me in this process.  I am more than grateful for the generosity and prayers.

In my first week of being in the States, as I travelled, I received a phone call which turned into an informal interview, a conversation in Spanish, and then eventually, a formal interview with Gordon College (which is located just 5 minutes away from the seminary's campus).  I got a job as an Adjunct professor and have been teaching a Spanish class there for a month now.  I have a class of 15 students who God has placed in front of me to pray for, encourage and challenge in their faith. (Oh yes, and I get to help them improve their writing and grammar skills in Spanish!) Getting this job was a miracle and has been a true blessing thus far, as I truly love teaching and being able to use my Spanish.

God sees me and knows what I need.
I had been in the States just two days when I received a message from a former Makarios intern telling me that her husband studies at Gordon-Conwell and that they live on campus.  My heart jumped!  I remember thinking, "Really? I will know someone when I get there?"  I thought I was moving to a place where I didn't know a soul.  But God knew what I needed to help make for a more smooth transition.  Sarah and her husband have been angels sent by God, letting me stay with them the first week in the area before my apartment was ready, helping me put together IKEA furniture, and patiently listening to stories about the Dominican as I process the change!  They've taught me so much about how we should love each other as part of the body of Christ -- selflessly and joyfully.

God encourages me through the community of believers here.
Orientation at Gordon-Conwell was a breath of fresh air with the highlight being a "dessert with the faculty."  Since I am a scholarship student, I was invited to go to the president's home and had the opportunity to meet both him and his wife.  As a group of about 15, we spent 2.5 hours sharing our stories, how God has been working in our lives, and how we arrived at the seminary. Being among former youth ministry leaders, men from Africa and India, former missionary kids, a Biblical languages scholar, and not to mention the president who has a heart for missions, I began to feel incredibly honored and humbled to be a part of this community.  For the first time, in the midst of so much change, I began to feel excited about this next step.  The people in that room have already become some with whom I have shared more meals and deeper conversations.  I am excited to see how God will continue to build community, deepen relationships and cultivate life-long friendships and ministry partners in my time here.

The next day, I walked away enamored by the passion with which two professors shared an overview of the Bible in just three hours.  I was once again encouraged by their love for God and His Word and by their passion for teaching others to understand it.  I am currently in one of the professor's Old Testament classes where I will be challenged to teach the overview of the Old Testament to a group of people outside of the seminary.

That weekend before classes started, I participated in a retreat through the Pierce Center for Discipleship.  We spent a day learning more about the fellowship that I will be a part of -- which focuses on spiritual formation and leading a group of women in "soul care."  After having lived in the Dominican Republic if I understand anything, it is the need to spend time listening to God and to have friends who pray for and with you.

God reminds me that He alone is God.
He reminds me to have an eternal perspective. I have heard rumors since I've been here of how seminary is stressful and anxiety-ridden.  I've heard that students can fall into the trap of being so concentrated on their studies that they lose sight of God and the people around them.  It makes me sad as I see the temptation to make these studies more important than the relationship with the One who makes the studies possible.   I see the temptation to strive for perfection or to put studies above people. As I've been reading the Old Testament, God has reminded me of the Israelites constantly making idols and fixing their eyes on everything else but God.  And, I am reminded of the need for Sabbath and daily time with Him, remembering that He along is God!

And so, those moments when I begin to feel overwhelmed by all of the "new" around me, I thank God for His overwhelming presence.  When I am confused and I don't know if I can memorize all of the new Greek vocabulary words and cases, I thank God that when I am weak He is strong!  I thank Him for classmates who "get it" and a TA who is willing to help.  When my body is tired, I thank God for providing me rest.  And, when I am missing the Dominican and my friends and family there, I thank God for my experiences there and for the people that He has already placed around me in this community here - some who know what it's like to live abroad.

Overall, I am doing well!  I would love your continued prayer, and hope that you will continue to follow me on this journey as God prepares me for future ministry.

PLEASE PRAY:

  • Classes began about 3 weeks ago.  This semester I have a full plate along with teaching at Gordon College. I am taking 4 classes -- Old Testament Survey, Greek I, Church History to the Reformation, and Spiritual Formation.  Each class has a lot of reading -- typically about 1500 pages per class.  Please pray for me as I have been out of school for many, many years!  Figuring out rhythms for studying is a new challenge.
  • Finding a church family is an exciting but challenging time. Where will God lead me?  There are lots of churches here -- many pastored by Gordon-Conwell graduates.  Many are different than the types of churches that I am used to.  Please pray that God would open my eyes to where I should settle into a local church with sound doctrine, a close-knit community, and opportunities to serve.   
  • May God help me to have an eternal perspective. May I take care of my deep need to be with my Father first. May I do the best that I can in my studies and love well the people around me!

MARK YOUR CALENDARS. In the early evening on Sunday, November 10, there will be a Dominican celebration / reflection in Atlanta of what God has done through me in the Dominican Republic and an update about where I think He is leading.  The event will be a way for me to bring closure to my time there and to say "thank you" to all who have journeyed with me thus far.  I would love all of my Atlanta-area supporters to attend, if possible.  I will post / send a formal invite soon.