Broken & Loving It!

Don’t let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, and trust also in me. There is more than enough room in my Father’s home. If this were not so, would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you?  John 14:1-2 

Lately, I've been struck by the life I live and the continual conversations with God about what He wants from me, the feelings of compassion for the dominican people, and the occasional tears that stream down my face when it hits me how they live each day. My life is one where I go back and forth between various worlds (extreme poverty, the missionary complex and the capital), I learn more and more each day about families that don't have enough food to eat, I pray with mothers who feel hopeless, I meet kids who suffer from abandonment and abuse, I see poverty all around me, and I continue to realize the disparities in education.  And then, I also meet and am surrounded in another world by people who eat plenty, are well-educated, and live comfortably... I, in fact, will always have my education, support of my family and probably will never know what it feels like to go weeks at a time eating only yuca, sugar cane and rice.  And I can't help but be confused by the disparity.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.

Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.

Proverbs 3:5-6

And, God reminds me that there is HOPE.  Stick with it.  Trust in Him. I was sent Jesus Calling over Christmas and although I am still reading through the Bible (I have read the same amount in the last 6 months that I had read in the previous year before coming here -- Thanks be to God!), I have found comfort in being able to read snippets of encouragement each morning.  

"Trust is a golden pathway to heaven.  When you walk on this path, you live above your circumstances.  My glorious Light shines more brightly on those who follow this path of Life.  Dare to walk on the high road with Me, for it is the most direct route to heaven.  The low road is circuitous: twisting and turning in agonizing knots.  There the air hangs heavy -- and dark, ominous clouds predominate.  Relying on your own understanding will weigh you down.  Trust in Me absolutely, and I will make your path straight." -Jesus Calling, 1.27.2014

Tuesday a week ago was a holiday here in the Dominican Republic.  I had the opportunity to go throughout Quisqueya and talk to families about their stories.  There are a ton of kids whose stories I still do not have for the SCORE website and whose houses I do not know how to get to.  Thus, I have to depend on Mirqueya to lead me to the homes and introduce me to the families.  On Tuesday, from 12:30pm until around 7:30pm, Mirqueya and I went house to house collecting information.  Truthfully, I was completely drained by the end of it.  Please pray for the mothers who I met, especially one that sticks out, Nancy. Please pray for their salvation, pray for their employment needs and pray for the hopelessness that they feel.  Please pray for me as I continue to have contact with both them and their children -- pray that I would serve them well and that God's will would be done in terms of my ministry with them.

Wednesday and Thursday of last week, I headed to the capital to find books for the library and look for a rug and chairs.  I am hopeful to open the library next week and have excepted that everything won't be perfect and that all of the books won't be on the shelf at the opening.  But, I have had a few customers already.  The kids are eager to read and excited about the new books.  Please pray that God would guide me in how to run the library.  I have three young adults who are willing to run it when I am not around.  Please pray for wisdom in teaching them to use a computer, to organize books alphabetically and to supervise the library.  

Saturday afternoon, I had the opportunity to take 5 little girls from Quisqueya to go shopping thanks to their sponsors who sent $25 for their birthdays.  $25 is equivalent to 1000 pesos.  Many of their parents don't make nearly that much money in a month of week, so going shopping was a complete joy.  We headed to San Pedro after feeding the girls a typical dominican lunch of salami, rice and beans and after the girls had spent about 30 minutes reading books.  I told each girl that they had 1000 pesos and that she could buy toys or clothes or food.  Three of them had a list with needs that their mom had written down for them.  These needs included underwear, detergent, shoes, etc.  (And, with all of their needs and wants, one of the things that brought them the biggest smiles was the freedom to buy Corn Flakes. Oh, the little pleasures!)  But for me, the best part of the shopping experience was turning it into an educational experience.  The teacher in me made them do the math.  I handed them a pencil and paper and we spent about 3 hours going up and down the aisles, often blocking them, because the girls were adding and subtracting their totals trying to get as close to 1000 pesos as possible.  Please pray for continued opportunities to spend with the kids at Emanuel House.  Please pray for God to open up more real-life opportunities for them to learn.  I praise the Lord for creative ideas and for opportunities to share with the girls in small excursions like going to the store -- something they may have otherwise never done.

Saturday night I had the opportunity to bring food to a family that needed it.  After having been there for just 5 minutes, the mom and two oldest brothers arrived with heavy sugar cane stalks on their backs.  With no expectations to eat anything else that night, they had gone seeking sugar cane to eat and to sell.  I praise God for leading me to their home that night.  I praise God for allowing me to get to know their family and to be able to provide a little bit of work to two kids in her family.  I also praise God for the Bible / Sermons given to me by my dad that I was able to hand out to the mom who has been feeling sad lately.  Please pray that God would bring more employment and daily food to their table. 

Today, I had the opportunity to travel with Elpidia, the woman who has cancer and is a mother of 9 children -- 5 of whom are girls under the age of 12.  I have fallen in love with each one of the girls and am thankful that God had mercy on Elpidia and saved her soul.  Today, we woke up at 6:15 and left around 7:30 to bring Elpidia to the doctor in Santo Domingo.  Since I met her late last year, Elpidia has not walked nor left her bed.  I actually have never seen her even sit up.  She eats liquid food and has cancer in abundance throughout her body.  In the States, she would not live where she does and would undoubtedly be in hospice.  I am thankful to have been able to take her today an hour and fifteen minutes away to a hospital in the capital where a doctor saw her and prescribed her morphine for her pain.  She also had the opportunity to travel to Pasitos de Jesus Girls Home where she will most likely be sending her children in the next few days.  Please pray for her husband's heart, that it would be softened to allow her children to leave.  Right now, the girls are not receiving the care needed because of their mom's condition.  Please pray for the father's salvation.  Please pray for the girls and for Elpidia.  May she find comfort from her medicine and be able to sleep well through the night.

Praise the Lord for:

opportunities to share Jesus with dominican kids

friends who I can talk to 

the ability to provide food for those who don't have it

transportation -- both public and my car

people who want to sponsor kids

prayer warriors

Mirqueya's heart for the kids

Dalma's willingness to take in 5 precious girls

people in need of work

Iglesia Bautista Misionera (in Quisqueya) & for renewed hope in one of its members

continued Bible memorization in Spanish

patience with me missing skype sessions

warm baths

Elpidia's kids and their hugs

Softball practices!  YIPPEE

Thank you, Lord for glimpses of hope.  Please help me to trust completely in You, understanding that You are in control, that You see everything that is happening here and that You know the desires and the needs of Your people.  Help me to not be discouraged, to continue to feel compassion, and to be broken just as I'm sure You are over the circumstances of the people here.  Lord, help me to continue to bless those in need around me though Your provisions.  Most of all help me to grow more and more in my faith in, love for and dependence on You.  To YOU be the glory!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Guns & Dolls and a few other things

Well,  everything's back to normal after the holidays.  We had our Three Kings celebration with the kids on January 6, last Monday.  The Dominican tradition is for all of the little kids to each get a gift on that day.  The Emanuel House kids (many of whom are the poorest in the town in which I live) each received lots of cake, candy, soda and in the end the girls received huge dolls and the boys received big cars.  The money for the party was donated by a church in the states.  It was truly a crazy yet fun celebration.

Likewise over at the girls home, the kids celebrated Three Kings Day but in a different way.  Being a girls home has its advantages. Many people who have met the girls there enjoy it so much that they wanted to give them gifts for the holidays.  In doing so, the girls received a few different gifts during a few different small and big parties.  On Three Kings Day, supposedly there were kids at the gate of their home asking for gifts.  Dalma, the owner of the orphanage was so torn as to what to do.  (I imagine that not getting a gift on Three Kings Day would be like not getting a gift on Christmas.)  So, Dalma and the girls at Pasitos de Jesus did what any compassionate person would do, right?  They went inside and gathered gifts that others had brought to them and handed them out to kids on the street who hadn't received a gift yet.  Awesome lessons that the little ones are learning... to share what's been given to them.  Amazing.

One of my biggest surprises and disappointments after being back for the holidays are the guns that are everywhere.  Fortunately, they are not real guns, but they are still guns.  Boys, many who are teenagers were given guns for Christmas.  On the streets around dusk, it is not uncommon to see teenagers with their very real looking toy black guns chasing other kids down the street.  Oh, did I mention that they have cloth wrapped around their heads covering every part except their eyes.  They look like terrorists or bank robbers.  Truly I ask for prayer over Quisqueya's young boys.  I ask that God would raise up men to disciple and lead these young boys.  I hear people say, "They are just mimicking what they see on t.v." which may be true, but it's so sad.  Please pray for Godly men to enter their lives.  There is an incredible need for Godly men in this community.

Contrary to the boys and much to my surprise, 13 and 14 year old girls received dolls for Christmas and  they enjoy playing with them.  I don't know what it says about a community where boys get guns and girls get dolls, but it's the reality where I live.

Overall, since I've been back, I have been getting back into the groove of things.  Look below to see what I've been up to:

I have spent more and more time with 5 little girls (4, 6, 9, 11, and 12 years old) whose mother is dying of cancer.  Please pray for her mother's pain.  Her name is Elpidia and she is unable to get out of her bed and she has to depend on her neighbor to take care of the girls.  They have had lice twice since I've known them. Pray for the girls and their future and for their health.  Plans are being made as to where they will live once their mom dies.

I have hired a few young people (early 20s) who were in need of work to help input library books in my computer.  Please pray that the money they earn in helping me will provide for food for their families.  Pray that the skills learned in using the computer can be beneficial later and that they will also pass those skills on to others.  It is possible that I have found my librarians for when I am not available.  Thanks be to God!  Please pray for confirmation in that!

I am reading When Helping Hurts and learning a ton about poverty and how to approach it in a way that brings God's Kingdom to Earth.  Please pray that I seek out God in everything that I do.  The last thing that I want to do in ministry is hurt those that I believe God has sent me to help.

Praise God for all of the donations of books.  I don't have a final count yet, but hopefully I will post pictures in the next couple of weeks.  I am hoping for it to "open" for a few hours a day by the end of January.

The 5 little ones who I have become close too.  Prayers appreciated!

Rosanna!  She attends Emmanuel House along with her little sister.

It seems tradition is to dress up as a doll for the Three Kings Day celebration.
The kids liked it!

Look closely and you'll see a kid (fake) gun in hand and face covered.
Prayers appreciated!

Martha Moments

written January 2, 2013

I have been back home in the Dominican for a few days now and I find my mind racing, myself feeling insufficient, overwhelmed with what is to be done, not useful, unable, and the list goes on and on and on.  Last night, I was praying to God about all of those negative adjectives that were racing through my brain.  I don't know where they came from nor why they hit me when I am technically still away from ministry for another day.  I thank God for answering me.  Adrienne is insufficient, BUT GOD IS ABUNDANT.  Adrienne is overwhelmed, BUT GOD IS PEACE.  GOD HAS A PLAN. Adrienne is not useful, BUT GOD CAN USE HER.  Adrienne is unable, but thank God that HE IS ABLE.

Please pray for me to be renewed over and over again by reading God's Word and praying.  Sometimes, all of those things hit me.  And, only when I remember all of God's attributes am I okay.  God's work not mine.

Honestly, since I've been back, I haven't even done much other than spend time with my Dominican family in the capital.  But, I have been calculating all that I have to do.  And, sometimes when I could be sitting and spending time, I have separated myself and relaxed, done some computer work that I needed to do, and spent time in the Word.  I also had an opportunity to go back to Quisqueya for a day for dinner that was provided for the kids by Alfonso Soriano.  Since I never had the chance to meet him, I decided to go.  His foundation has helped Emanuel House tremendously.  During the dinner, I ended up serving most of the time.  I spent some time with kids, but never met the famous baseball player and was truly concerned with helping more than the social aspect.

These last few days have been similar.  I seem to constantly gravitate towards doing -- even when it's just planning in my head.  Sometimes, I forget to enjoy. Yesterday when all of those thoughts came to my brain, I thought about Mary and Martha.  I have always wondered who I am more like and never been able to come to a conclusion.  Yesterday I realized that I definitely have my Martha moments.  This morning when I woke up and picked up Jesus Calling and read, this was God's message to me:

"Relax in My healing presence.  As you spend time with Me, your thoughts tend to jump ahead to today's plans and problems.  Bring your mind back to Me for refreshment and renewal.  Let the Light of My presence soak into you, as you focus your thoughts on Me.  Thus I equip you to face whatever the day brings.  This sacrifice of time pleases Me and strengthens you.  Do not skimp on our time together.  Resist the clamor of tasks waiting to be done.  You have chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from you."

And, the Lord gave me these passages:

Psalm 105:4
Search for the Lord and for His strength; continually seek Him.

Luke 10:39-42
Her sister, Mary, sat at the Lord's feet, listening to what he taught.  But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing.  She came to Jesus and said, "Lord, doesn't it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work?  Tell her to come and help me."  But the Lord said to her, "My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details!  There is only one thing worth being concerned about.  Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her."

Truly, reading this made me gasp.  The Lord is so funny to me.  Isn't He just Good?  He knows what I need to hear and He knows just when I need to hear it.

Starting tomorrow, I will be getting back into my routine again.  Before doing so, He has shown me that I definitely have Martha moments and that it is okay to stop and spend time with Him and with His children.  I don't need to get overwhelmed over the details nor have feelings of unfairness towards those who may have more Mary moments, but instead, I need to be concentrated on Jesus -- intentionally spending time at His feet.

GOD IS ABUNDANT!
GOD IS PEACE!
GOD HAS A PLAN!
GOD CAN USE ME!
GOD IS ABLE!
GOD IS GOOD!

I thank the Lord for His Word today.  I pray that it blesses you as it has blessed me.

PRAYER REQUESTS
Please pray for the Lord's continued peace.  Please pray for His continual revelation through His Word.  Please pray for ministry over the next week -- that I would use my hands to do His work, and that I would be intentionally in His Word and in prayer.